Dave has been gone one month today. If you count a month as in from date to date rather than four weeks, which was actually a few days ago. Sunday, to be exact. Not that I'm counting or anything.. I still can't say when he'll be home of course, OPSEC & all. I think it's okay to say that our halfway night dinner is coming up. There are a lot of things you realize during a deployment, & the one that always hits me hardest is that even our worst day when we're together is better than my best day without him.
In happier news, I've gotten a few grades back. Call the dog tags chiche' if you will, but I'm telling you friend, they work! My math midterm was last Thursday. Chop had commandeered his daddy's tags & chain, so I found the single loose tag that's kept in my jewelry box & stashed it in the back pocket of my jeans. I was on the verge of hyperventilating the whole time I was taking the test. Math is not my strong suit. I kinda suck at it to be honest. I left knowing I'd completely bombed it. My professor emailed the class tonight to let us know he'd graded them & posted our scores. I thought I could check it out all by myself, but when the site pulled up, I seriously thought my heart might stop. I had to turn off the screen & call Jen to be "with" me. Because that makes total sense, rightttt? No. It turned out to be anxiety over nada - I got an 89! Whoo hoooo! Jen got so excited with me, both of us were screaming & I thought for sure she was about to go into labor. My research paper for philosophy almost drive me insane because I went back & forth over just the right topic for weeks & still ended up having to ask for an extension (although that was due to things unrelated to my procrastination) & wrote the entire thing the night before it was due. I got my grade back for that last night - 9 out of 10! I'm starting to see that I stress a lot over school stuff that I really shouldn't stress that much over. I spend too much time coming up with the perfect answer, or paper, or response, when yes, thought is required, but it's not something to completely wig out over.
My philosophy & psych classes will be over next weekend. So weird to think of how quickly the semester has passed & yet this patrol has gone by sooooo slow. I registered for next semester's classes this week. The next algebra, human biology, & medical terminology. I wish I could do more prereqs, but until I knock out the rest of my math prereqs, I can't take the other requirements - chemistry & such. Seems like this college gig may take a little longer than I'd thought..
We're making Thansgiving plans around here. It'll be our first Thanksgiving without Dave, but we're still doing it up. My dad has bought a smoker & we have BIG plans for it, involving a turkey & a ham. I've invited some fellow boat wives over so it should by a lively good time. Lotsss of food. Yum.
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Happy Veterans Day
It's Veterans Day! Did you thank a vet today?
I come from a long line of military vets. My great grandfather came over from the Netherlands to fight for the US during WWII. My grandfather was in the Army, stationed in the Phillipines during the Korean war. My great uncle was on the USS Enterprise, & my uncle was in the Air Force. My dad was in the ANG during Vietnam. I'm the first female in my family to serve, which I did in the Coast Guard after 9/11, & I'm married to a Navy submariner. Yep.. That's a long line.
It was a pretty solemn day around here. We watched the memorial for the victims of the Ft. Hood yesterday, & the families of those at Ft. Lewis weighed heavy on my heart today. I try to take holidays like this to help Shelbye understand everything that's going on. She gets that her dad is gone & that it's just part of life, but she doesn't understand the real reasons behind it. She doesn't get that there's a war raging, or how many Americans are involved in it or have been lost to it. She really doesn't understand the events at Ft. Hood. She couldn't get why I was crying over people I've never met. Part of me wants to help her understand, but the larger part thinks it's best that she doesn't get it. Her life is affected enough by it all by losing her dad for six months out of the year; she should be shielded from the worst of it for as long as possible. So today's conversation basically consisted of explaining that our freedoms are protected by people like Dave who leave their families behind & make sacrifices so that they can keep us safe. I told her that the military is like a big family, & if someone dies, it doesn't matter if we actually knew them, it's still losing a part of our big military family.
So thank you, to those who have served & are serving now. Thank you to the wives of those who are away, those who are holding their breath wishing their deployment wouldn't come, & those who won't be coming home
"As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them." -- JFK
I come from a long line of military vets. My great grandfather came over from the Netherlands to fight for the US during WWII. My grandfather was in the Army, stationed in the Phillipines during the Korean war. My great uncle was on the USS Enterprise, & my uncle was in the Air Force. My dad was in the ANG during Vietnam. I'm the first female in my family to serve, which I did in the Coast Guard after 9/11, & I'm married to a Navy submariner. Yep.. That's a long line.
It was a pretty solemn day around here. We watched the memorial for the victims of the Ft. Hood yesterday, & the families of those at Ft. Lewis weighed heavy on my heart today. I try to take holidays like this to help Shelbye understand everything that's going on. She gets that her dad is gone & that it's just part of life, but she doesn't understand the real reasons behind it. She doesn't get that there's a war raging, or how many Americans are involved in it or have been lost to it. She really doesn't understand the events at Ft. Hood. She couldn't get why I was crying over people I've never met. Part of me wants to help her understand, but the larger part thinks it's best that she doesn't get it. Her life is affected enough by it all by losing her dad for six months out of the year; she should be shielded from the worst of it for as long as possible. So today's conversation basically consisted of explaining that our freedoms are protected by people like Dave who leave their families behind & make sacrifices so that they can keep us safe. I told her that the military is like a big family, & if someone dies, it doesn't matter if we actually knew them, it's still losing a part of our big military family.
So thank you, to those who have served & are serving now. Thank you to the wives of those who are away, those who are holding their breath wishing their deployment wouldn't come, & those who won't be coming home
"As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them." -- JFK
Friday, November 6, 2009
Ft. Hood
Please keep the families & those affected by the Fort Hood shooting yesterday in your thoughts & prayers. Another senseless act of violence. It saddens me to know that the soldiers were shot at the one place they could feel completely safe, & they will never feel safe again. Regardless of the shooter's motives, whether they were terror based or not, senseless is an understatement. There are so many other ways to make your political statement. Taking the lives of others, especially those you were trusted to protect, is incomprehensible.
Monday, November 2, 2009
Halloween
I can't believe it's November already! Maybe that's partly because it was in the upper 80's on Halloween & today all of a sudden it's in the 60's. Not that I'm complaining, hoodie weather is the best! So Halloween has come & gone, Shelbye has a big stash of candy, & Chop is glad I'm not making him wear that costume anymore. Shelbye was a batterina, & Chase was a spider. Ohhhh the spidey cuteness! Other than Georgia losing to Florida (& the ensuing trash talk that comes from living so close to Jax), it was an awesome day. We hung out at a friend's house & trick or treated with her & her boys. Good times.
My English final came back & the dog tags worked! My final grade for the class is an A. I couldn't be happier. One class down, three to go. For this semester anyway. My math midterm is this week, & my two other classes will be over by Thanksgiving.
Today starts a new week, a much better week. A week that isn't filled with being anxious & stressed over things I can do nothing about. A week that's filled with counting blessing & not focusing on the things that are difficult. A week full of Halloween candy, pumpkin stuff, & Chop kisses. Last week was much rougher than I'd like to admit, but it's a new week, & that means seven days to do things better than I did last week, & that we're seven days closer to my love coming home. It's going to be a good week.
“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own” (Matthew 6:34).
“‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart’” (Jeremiah 29:11-13).
My English final came back & the dog tags worked! My final grade for the class is an A. I couldn't be happier. One class down, three to go. For this semester anyway. My math midterm is this week, & my two other classes will be over by Thanksgiving.
Today starts a new week, a much better week. A week that isn't filled with being anxious & stressed over things I can do nothing about. A week that's filled with counting blessing & not focusing on the things that are difficult. A week full of Halloween candy, pumpkin stuff, & Chop kisses. Last week was much rougher than I'd like to admit, but it's a new week, & that means seven days to do things better than I did last week, & that we're seven days closer to my love coming home. It's going to be a good week.
“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own” (Matthew 6:34).
“‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart’” (Jeremiah 29:11-13).
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Ok, so it's been a little while..
but this house = full time crazy. I'd happily settle for part time crazy right now. I don't know how much blogging I'll be able to do in the near future. I have two massive papers due & a midterm next week, plus the everyday excitement of life without Dave. Add in the weekly blood work & lots of doctor's appointments, & I'll be lucky to finish all my homework & find time to sleep. Without going into great detail (because those of you that need to know the why already do), this is day two of progesterone therapy four times a day, plus a handful of extra vitamins, B6, B12, & tons of folic acid. For someone pumped full of vitamin B, I'm awfully tired. I fell asleep on the couch with Chop last night watching It's the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown. If only dishes & laundry would take care of themselves, right? I need a straight IV of coffee.. Stat! Oh, & an email would be nice too. I know that's not going to be coming any time soon, but a girl can dream! Until then I guess I'll settle for a one sided conversation with him. Two weeks down, a million more to go, or so it seems. It's days like these that make me wish that he wasn't going to reenlist. If that were the case, this would be our last patrol. At the most, one more. At least then there would be a light at the end of the tunnel. Right now, no such light exists. Tomorrow pay day will hit & I'll remind myself how lucky we are as I'm using our BAH to pay our mortgage, but until then.. Navy, you stink! Today is just one of those days filled with a 9 year old girl that rolls her little eyes & a little boy who is crabby because he's on a nap strike. Bed time will come soon for the little ones & then I'll get to sit down & work on those dreaded papers that I've put off all week..
Friday, October 16, 2009
We be jammin'.
As promised, my ENC final compilation. An eclectic mix maybe, but I needed something drastic to be in the zone. Plus, it's not often that I can listen to whatever I want as loud as I want because I always have the kiddos in the car. Oh how I miss the days of gloriously loud music whenever I felt like it. Driving to school last night took me back to when I first got my liscense.. only with a much nicer & more reliable car that didn't have possessed headlights. What a leap from my '85 Mustang (the last year that the Mustang was built of out metal, might I add) to my lovely '07 Accord. But I digress..
- The playlist -
All We Know - Paramore
I'm So Sick - Flyleaf
Hallelujah - Paramore
Fully Alive - Flyleaf
Brick By Boring Brick - Paramore
Ain't No Rest For the Wicked - Cage the Elephant
Back Against the Wall - Cage the Elephant
All Around Me - Flyleaf
Hallelujah - Kate Voegle
Break - Three Days Grace
Misery Business - Paramore
That's How Strong My Love Is - Otis Redding
Ignorance - Paramore
Born For This - Paramore
Use Somebody (Kings of Leon cover) - Paramore
That's What You Get - Paramore
For A Pessimist, I'm Pretty Optimistic - Paramore
Re-Education (Through Labor) - Rise Against
Savior - Rise Against
Sound Of Madness - Shinedown
I'll admit that I was all cliche' & wore Dave's dog tags for my final. I carry them around when he's gone for two reasons - for good luck, & because they make me feel like he's with me in some small way. We'll see if it worked when I get my grades in a few weeks.
- The playlist -
All We Know - Paramore
I'm So Sick - Flyleaf
Hallelujah - Paramore
Fully Alive - Flyleaf
Brick By Boring Brick - Paramore
Ain't No Rest For the Wicked - Cage the Elephant
Back Against the Wall - Cage the Elephant
All Around Me - Flyleaf
Hallelujah - Kate Voegle
Break - Three Days Grace
Misery Business - Paramore
That's How Strong My Love Is - Otis Redding
Ignorance - Paramore
Born For This - Paramore
Use Somebody (Kings of Leon cover) - Paramore
That's What You Get - Paramore
For A Pessimist, I'm Pretty Optimistic - Paramore
Re-Education (Through Labor) - Rise Against
Savior - Rise Against
Sound Of Madness - Shinedown
I'll admit that I was all cliche' & wore Dave's dog tags for my final. I carry them around when he's gone for two reasons - for good luck, & because they make me feel like he's with me in some small way. We'll see if it worked when I get my grades in a few weeks.
A day in the life..
Yesterday was interesting, to say the least. Actually, interesting is a bit of an understatement. I'm sure it's just the first of many to come this patrol. I will say that the deployment gremlins have settled in nicely & are making themselves right at home.
I started the day in the usual fashion - I started with my coffee & waited for Chop to wake up. When he did, I gave him his morning sippy cup. He's a lot like me in that he needs his wake up time, so he drinks his cup in his crib while I enjoy my coffee in the sunroom while listening for him to let me know he's wide awake & bushy tailed over the baby monitor. I never heard anything on the monitor, so I assumed he'd gone back to sleep, which isn't unusual after he's had a night like the one before. I didn't think anything of it until I heard something banging around in the kitchen. Figuring it was the cats, I got up to investigate. It was the cats - running from Chase! He'd figured out how to drop the side of his crib & climb out. Oh Lord.. The monkey phase has begun.
No big deal. I put up the baby gate in the hallway & let him run (crawl) loose. I had the laundry room door shut, so he could safely have free run. I guess I didn't have the door completely shut (I blame the fabric thingy under the door that supposed to keep the air in/out of the laundry room because it isn't insulated that sometimes makes it seem like the door is shut when it can really be opened by pushing hard), because all of a sudden, Chase was nowhere to be found and incredibly quiet - never a good sign. I found him sitting in the litter box saying "Kitty poop! Ew!" Thankfully he didn't have time to put anything in his mouth, & I grabbed him up & put him in the bath tub. No harm, no foul, right?
Wrong.
Then I realized there's something up with the toilet in the kids' bathroom. After some investigation & interrogation, I find out that Chase definitely threw something down the potty the other night while he & Shelbye were playing while I was trying to work on homework, & Shelbye hasn't seen Dave's watch since the day after he left. Chase's container for his bath toys are right next to the toilet, between it & the tub. My first reaction is that Dave's watch has been sacrificed to the MoMo monster (my dad's name for the monster that supposedly lives in the potty). I'm really hoping that it's just a bath toy. I'm also really hoping we can figure out how to fix it & I don't have to shell out the cash to pay for a plumber.
Keira came over yesterday afternoon to help me lower Chase's crib. We totally had it until we realized that Dave had rigged it to fit only in the first position & we didn't have a screw long/wide enough to make it fit into any of the lower ones. No biggie, I figured I'd just swing by & pick one up on the way home from my final.
Dad came over to watch the kids, & Chase was still in rare form, so I knew he was going to have an interesting night. After spending about an hour trying to figure out which of the four topics I would write my essay about (that's a topic for a whole other blog, which I'll write soon), I headed out to door for my final. I'd burnt a lovely little compilation of music to help me get my creative juices flowing (which I'll also share soon), so I was ready.
After my final, I stopped by Target to pick up the screw & a couple odds & ends. I spent almost thirty minutes wandering around Target before I could find their ridiculously tiny selection of hardware. It was already going on 9, & I'd promised Dad I'd be home by 9, so I was in a big hurry. Of course their selection was limited to screws & nails that were for hanging pictures & such, not so much cribs, but I though I could make it work. I grabbed them & headed home. I made it home at about 9:30. Dad & I went straight to Chop's room to try to see if these would work. They wouldn't. They were long enough but not wide enough. Darn! Dad headed home, & I got the kids ready for & into bed (Chop had to sleep in his playpen for the night). Whew.
I actually made it to bed before midnight last night! It was awesome, except for the part about waking up almost every hour. I'm still thrilled though, because even with the broken sleep, I still racked up more hours than I have all week.
I started the day in the usual fashion - I started with my coffee & waited for Chop to wake up. When he did, I gave him his morning sippy cup. He's a lot like me in that he needs his wake up time, so he drinks his cup in his crib while I enjoy my coffee in the sunroom while listening for him to let me know he's wide awake & bushy tailed over the baby monitor. I never heard anything on the monitor, so I assumed he'd gone back to sleep, which isn't unusual after he's had a night like the one before. I didn't think anything of it until I heard something banging around in the kitchen. Figuring it was the cats, I got up to investigate. It was the cats - running from Chase! He'd figured out how to drop the side of his crib & climb out. Oh Lord.. The monkey phase has begun.
No big deal. I put up the baby gate in the hallway & let him run (crawl) loose. I had the laundry room door shut, so he could safely have free run. I guess I didn't have the door completely shut (I blame the fabric thingy under the door that supposed to keep the air in/out of the laundry room because it isn't insulated that sometimes makes it seem like the door is shut when it can really be opened by pushing hard), because all of a sudden, Chase was nowhere to be found and incredibly quiet - never a good sign. I found him sitting in the litter box saying "Kitty poop! Ew!" Thankfully he didn't have time to put anything in his mouth, & I grabbed him up & put him in the bath tub. No harm, no foul, right?
Wrong.
Then I realized there's something up with the toilet in the kids' bathroom. After some investigation & interrogation, I find out that Chase definitely threw something down the potty the other night while he & Shelbye were playing while I was trying to work on homework, & Shelbye hasn't seen Dave's watch since the day after he left. Chase's container for his bath toys are right next to the toilet, between it & the tub. My first reaction is that Dave's watch has been sacrificed to the MoMo monster (my dad's name for the monster that supposedly lives in the potty). I'm really hoping that it's just a bath toy. I'm also really hoping we can figure out how to fix it & I don't have to shell out the cash to pay for a plumber.
Keira came over yesterday afternoon to help me lower Chase's crib. We totally had it until we realized that Dave had rigged it to fit only in the first position & we didn't have a screw long/wide enough to make it fit into any of the lower ones. No biggie, I figured I'd just swing by & pick one up on the way home from my final.
Dad came over to watch the kids, & Chase was still in rare form, so I knew he was going to have an interesting night. After spending about an hour trying to figure out which of the four topics I would write my essay about (that's a topic for a whole other blog, which I'll write soon), I headed out to door for my final. I'd burnt a lovely little compilation of music to help me get my creative juices flowing (which I'll also share soon), so I was ready.
After my final, I stopped by Target to pick up the screw & a couple odds & ends. I spent almost thirty minutes wandering around Target before I could find their ridiculously tiny selection of hardware. It was already going on 9, & I'd promised Dad I'd be home by 9, so I was in a big hurry. Of course their selection was limited to screws & nails that were for hanging pictures & such, not so much cribs, but I though I could make it work. I grabbed them & headed home. I made it home at about 9:30. Dad & I went straight to Chop's room to try to see if these would work. They wouldn't. They were long enough but not wide enough. Darn! Dad headed home, & I got the kids ready for & into bed (Chop had to sleep in his playpen for the night). Whew.
I actually made it to bed before midnight last night! It was awesome, except for the part about waking up almost every hour. I'm still thrilled though, because even with the broken sleep, I still racked up more hours than I have all week.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Ouch!
What is that I feel? A big slap in the back of the head. A Gibbs slap, if you will. I love how I always seem to randomly find exactly what I need, even when I didn't know I needed it.
I'm going to borrow something from a blog I frequent. This is the original. I didn't write this, I merely found it & wanted to share. Need a Gibbs slap today?
"Below is "The Lord's Prayer" by a blogging pal of mine, Renee from Life with my Special K's. Although, she writes about herself in the following passage, I think we can really use this concepts in our lives."
The Lord's Prayer
"Our Father Who Art In Heaven.
Yes?
Don't interrupt me. I'm praying.
But -- you called ME!
Called you? No, I didn't call you. I'm praying. Our Father who art in Heaven.
There -- you did it again!
Did what?
Called ME. You said, "Our Father who art in Heaven" Well, here I am.. What's on your mind?
But didn't mean anything by it. I was, you know, just saying my prayers for the day.
I always say the Lord's Prayer. It makes me feel good, kind of like fulfilling a duty.
Well, all right. Go on.
Okay, Hallowed be thy name .
Hold it right there. What do you mean by that?
By what?
By "Hallowed be thy name"?
It means, it means ... good grief, I don't know what it means. How in the world should I know? It's just a part of the prayer. By the way, what does it mean?
It means honored, holy, wonderful.
Hey, that makes sense.. I never thought about what 'hallowed' meant before. Thanks.
Thy Kingdom come, Thy will be done, on earth as it is in Heaven.
Do you really mean that?
Sure, why not?
What are you doing about it?
Doing? Why, nothing, I guess. I just think it would be kind of neat if you got control, of everything down here like you have up there. We're kinda in a mess down here you know.
Yes, I know; but, have I got control of you?
Well, I go to church.
That isn't what I asked you. What about your bad temper? You've really got a problem there, you know. And then there's the way you spend your money -- all on yourself. And what about the kind of books you read?
Now hold on just a minute! Stop picking on me! I'm just as good as some of the rest of those People at church!
Excuse ME.. I thought you were praying for my will to be done. If that is to happen, it will have to start with the ones who are praying for it. Like you -- for example.
Oh, all right. I guess I do have some hang-ups. Now that you mention it, I could probably name some others.
So could I.
I haven't thought about it very much until now, but I really would like to cut out some of those things. I would like to, you know, be really free.
Good. Now we're getting somewhere. We'll work together -- You and ME. I'm proud of you.
Look, Lord, if you don't mind, I need to finish up here. This is taking a lot longer than it usually does. Give us this day, our daily bread.
You need to cut out the bread.. You're overweight as it is.
Hey, wait a minute! What is this? Here I was doing my religious duty, and all of a sudden you break in and remind me of all my hang-ups.
Praying is a dangerous thing. You just might get what you ask for. Remember, you called ME -- and here I am. It's too late to stop now. Keep praying. ( pause ... ) Well, go on.
I'm scared to.
Scared? Of what?
I know what you'll say.
Try ME.
Forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who sin against us.
What about Ann?
See? I knew it! I knew you would bring her up! Why, Lord, she's told lies about me, spread stories. She never paid back the money she owes me... I've sworn to get even with her!
But -- your prayer -- What about your prayer?
I didn't -- mean it..
Well, at least you're honest. But, it's quite a load carrying around all that bitterness and resentment isn't it?
Yes, but I'll feel better as soon as I get even with her. Boy, have I got some plans for her. She'll wish she had never been born.
No, you won't feel any better. You'll feel worse. Revenge isn't sweet. You know how unhappy you are -- Well, I can change that.
You can? How?
Forgive Ann. Then, I'll forgive you; And the hate and the sin, will be Ann's problem -- not yours. You will have settled the problem as far as you are concerned.
Oh, you know, you're right. You always are. And more than I want revenge, I want to be right with You . (sigh). All right, all right . I forgive her.
There now! Wonderful! How do you feel?
Hmmmm. Well, not bad. Not bad at all! In fact, I feel pretty great! You know, I don't think I'll go to bed uptight tonight. I haven't been getting much rest, you know.
Yeah, I know. But, you're not through with your prayer, are you? Go on.
Oh, all right. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.
Good! Good! I'll do that. Just don't put yourself in a place where you can be tempted.
What do you mean by that?
You know what I mean.
Yeah. I know.
Okay. Go ahead. Finish your prayer.
For Thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory forever. Amen.
Do you know what would bring me glory? What would really make me happy?
No, but I'd like to know. I want to please you now.. I've really made a mess of things. I want to truly follow you... I can see now how great that would be. So, tell me . . . How do I make you happy?
YOU just did".
I'm going to borrow something from a blog I frequent. This is the original. I didn't write this, I merely found it & wanted to share. Need a Gibbs slap today?
"Below is "The Lord's Prayer" by a blogging pal of mine, Renee from Life with my Special K's. Although, she writes about herself in the following passage, I think we can really use this concepts in our lives."
The Lord's Prayer
"Our Father Who Art In Heaven.
Yes?
Don't interrupt me. I'm praying.
But -- you called ME!
Called you? No, I didn't call you. I'm praying. Our Father who art in Heaven.
There -- you did it again!
Did what?
Called ME. You said, "Our Father who art in Heaven" Well, here I am.. What's on your mind?
But didn't mean anything by it. I was, you know, just saying my prayers for the day.
I always say the Lord's Prayer. It makes me feel good, kind of like fulfilling a duty.
Well, all right. Go on.
Okay, Hallowed be thy name .
Hold it right there. What do you mean by that?
By what?
By "Hallowed be thy name"?
It means, it means ... good grief, I don't know what it means. How in the world should I know? It's just a part of the prayer. By the way, what does it mean?
It means honored, holy, wonderful.
Hey, that makes sense.. I never thought about what 'hallowed' meant before. Thanks.
Thy Kingdom come, Thy will be done, on earth as it is in Heaven.
Do you really mean that?
Sure, why not?
What are you doing about it?
Doing? Why, nothing, I guess. I just think it would be kind of neat if you got control, of everything down here like you have up there. We're kinda in a mess down here you know.
Yes, I know; but, have I got control of you?
Well, I go to church.
That isn't what I asked you. What about your bad temper? You've really got a problem there, you know. And then there's the way you spend your money -- all on yourself. And what about the kind of books you read?
Now hold on just a minute! Stop picking on me! I'm just as good as some of the rest of those People at church!
Excuse ME.. I thought you were praying for my will to be done. If that is to happen, it will have to start with the ones who are praying for it. Like you -- for example.
Oh, all right. I guess I do have some hang-ups. Now that you mention it, I could probably name some others.
So could I.
I haven't thought about it very much until now, but I really would like to cut out some of those things. I would like to, you know, be really free.
Good. Now we're getting somewhere. We'll work together -- You and ME. I'm proud of you.
Look, Lord, if you don't mind, I need to finish up here. This is taking a lot longer than it usually does. Give us this day, our daily bread.
You need to cut out the bread.. You're overweight as it is.
Hey, wait a minute! What is this? Here I was doing my religious duty, and all of a sudden you break in and remind me of all my hang-ups.
Praying is a dangerous thing. You just might get what you ask for. Remember, you called ME -- and here I am. It's too late to stop now. Keep praying. ( pause ... ) Well, go on.
I'm scared to.
Scared? Of what?
I know what you'll say.
Try ME.
Forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who sin against us.
What about Ann?
See? I knew it! I knew you would bring her up! Why, Lord, she's told lies about me, spread stories. She never paid back the money she owes me... I've sworn to get even with her!
But -- your prayer -- What about your prayer?
I didn't -- mean it..
Well, at least you're honest. But, it's quite a load carrying around all that bitterness and resentment isn't it?
Yes, but I'll feel better as soon as I get even with her. Boy, have I got some plans for her. She'll wish she had never been born.
No, you won't feel any better. You'll feel worse. Revenge isn't sweet. You know how unhappy you are -- Well, I can change that.
You can? How?
Forgive Ann. Then, I'll forgive you; And the hate and the sin, will be Ann's problem -- not yours. You will have settled the problem as far as you are concerned.
Oh, you know, you're right. You always are. And more than I want revenge, I want to be right with You . (sigh). All right, all right . I forgive her.
There now! Wonderful! How do you feel?
Hmmmm. Well, not bad. Not bad at all! In fact, I feel pretty great! You know, I don't think I'll go to bed uptight tonight. I haven't been getting much rest, you know.
Yeah, I know. But, you're not through with your prayer, are you? Go on.
Oh, all right. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.
Good! Good! I'll do that. Just don't put yourself in a place where you can be tempted.
What do you mean by that?
You know what I mean.
Yeah. I know.
Okay. Go ahead. Finish your prayer.
For Thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory forever. Amen.
Do you know what would bring me glory? What would really make me happy?
No, but I'd like to know. I want to please you now.. I've really made a mess of things. I want to truly follow you... I can see now how great that would be. So, tell me . . . How do I make you happy?
YOU just did".
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
"I bet..
..you're stronger than yesterday & tomorrow you'll be stronger than today."
I read that tonight. Awesome, isn't it? So simple, & yet so true.
I need things like that. Little tiny nuggets of truth that seem to make even the most horrible of days bearable. Today, I feel like a wretched, horrible person. There are so many blessing that I'm given on a daily basis, but I've spent all day wondering when the other shoe will drop. What a bad attitude to have. Luckily I've been able to put on the happy face for the kids & everyone I've seen today, so it's only eating at me. Today was a good day. A very good day. I got some amazing news. The kiddos were angels.
(Okay, so Chop cried for a good hour while Keira was sitting him, but he stopped as soon as I walked in the door, & honestly, who doesn't get a tiny pang of joy when no one is good enough for their kid but Mama? Sorry Keira, you know we love you!)
Yep. Today was a good day. Why so gloomy when everything is going so well? I don't know either. So tonight, while I really should be doing homework, or at the very least studying for my English final that is less that 24 hours away, I'm going to think happy thoughts.
Let's see.. Happy thoughts.
- coffee - coffee is pretty much my favorite thing. Even Dave knows that there is almost nothing that a good Java Chip from the local coffee dive won't fix.
- baby kisses - the slobbery ones that Chop has started laying all over my cheeks that sometimes end with a little "Num num num!" because he thinks it's hilarious. Turtle hugs are just as good.
- finding a random 10 minutes alone - even if it means hiding in the bathroom.
- getting to shave both legs in one shower - anyone who has kids knows that this is 'nuff said.
- finding a $20 in your hoodie - who doesn't love that?
- the random things my kids do - my kids are little clowns. They'll do dang near anything to get a laugh. A few weeks ago I found Turtle with our big, round laundry tub on her back with her arms through the rope handles. She then proceeded to start rolling down the hallway with it still on her back. When I asked her what she thought she was doing, she says, "I'm a turtle, Mama! A turrrrtle!" If that doesn't make you laugh, you have no heart.
- getting good grades on papers you worked super hard on (& ones you kinda sorta worked hard on).
and last but not least..
- emails - yep. I've gotten three in the last two days. In all of our patrols, this has never happened at the begining. I usually wait weeks & weeks before I hear anything from him. I sure do love that boy..
I read that tonight. Awesome, isn't it? So simple, & yet so true.
I need things like that. Little tiny nuggets of truth that seem to make even the most horrible of days bearable. Today, I feel like a wretched, horrible person. There are so many blessing that I'm given on a daily basis, but I've spent all day wondering when the other shoe will drop. What a bad attitude to have. Luckily I've been able to put on the happy face for the kids & everyone I've seen today, so it's only eating at me. Today was a good day. A very good day. I got some amazing news. The kiddos were angels.
(Okay, so Chop cried for a good hour while Keira was sitting him, but he stopped as soon as I walked in the door, & honestly, who doesn't get a tiny pang of joy when no one is good enough for their kid but Mama? Sorry Keira, you know we love you!)
Yep. Today was a good day. Why so gloomy when everything is going so well? I don't know either. So tonight, while I really should be doing homework, or at the very least studying for my English final that is less that 24 hours away, I'm going to think happy thoughts.
Let's see.. Happy thoughts.
- coffee - coffee is pretty much my favorite thing. Even Dave knows that there is almost nothing that a good Java Chip from the local coffee dive won't fix.
- baby kisses - the slobbery ones that Chop has started laying all over my cheeks that sometimes end with a little "Num num num!" because he thinks it's hilarious. Turtle hugs are just as good.
- finding a random 10 minutes alone - even if it means hiding in the bathroom.
- getting to shave both legs in one shower - anyone who has kids knows that this is 'nuff said.
- finding a $20 in your hoodie - who doesn't love that?
- the random things my kids do - my kids are little clowns. They'll do dang near anything to get a laugh. A few weeks ago I found Turtle with our big, round laundry tub on her back with her arms through the rope handles. She then proceeded to start rolling down the hallway with it still on her back. When I asked her what she thought she was doing, she says, "I'm a turtle, Mama! A turrrrtle!" If that doesn't make you laugh, you have no heart.
- getting good grades on papers you worked super hard on (& ones you kinda sorta worked hard on).
and last but not least..
- emails - yep. I've gotten three in the last two days. In all of our patrols, this has never happened at the begining. I usually wait weeks & weeks before I hear anything from him. I sure do love that boy..
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Sleep, where are you?
Insomnia stinks. It's even worse when you know that tomorrow could end up being a very HUGE day so you're all excited and anxious. I hate it when my body says it's exhausted but my brain refuses to give in. Or vice versa. So I'll just pass the time with this lovely little.. whatever it is. Lucky me that I was tagged, otherwise how would I pass this sleepless night?
The Rules:
Copy and change the answers to suit you and pass it on. You must use only one word answers!Once you have filled it out you then pass it on to 6 of your favorite bloggers and alert them that they have been awarded.
1. Where is your cell phone? kitchen
2. Your hair? up
3. Your mother? hotlanta
4. Your father? tattooed
5. Your favorite food? italian
6. Your dream last night? insane
7. Your favorite drink? coffee
8. Your dream/goal? happiness
9. What room are you in? sunroom
10. Your hobby? waiting
11. Your fear? spiders
12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? together
13. Where were you last night? keira's
14. Something that you aren't? organized
15. Muffins? apple
16. Wish list item? sleep
17. Where did you grow up? georgia
18. Last thing you did? ate
19. What are you wearing? pajamas
20. Your TV? huge
21. Your pets? annoying
22. Friends? best
23. Your life? blessed
24. Your mood? impatient
25. Missing someone? always
26. Vehicle? accord
27. Something you’re not wearing? socks
28. Your favorite store? AE
29. Your favorite color? pink
30. When was the last time you laughed? today
31. Last time you cried? sunday
32. Your best friend? hubster
33. One place that I go to over and over? starbucks!
34. One person who emails me regularly? mom
35. Favorite place to eat? luigi's
My six - you! C'mon, you know you wanna!
The Rules:
Copy and change the answers to suit you and pass it on. You must use only one word answers!Once you have filled it out you then pass it on to 6 of your favorite bloggers and alert them that they have been awarded.
1. Where is your cell phone? kitchen
2. Your hair? up
3. Your mother? hotlanta
4. Your father? tattooed
5. Your favorite food? italian
6. Your dream last night? insane
7. Your favorite drink? coffee
8. Your dream/goal? happiness
9. What room are you in? sunroom
10. Your hobby? waiting
11. Your fear? spiders
12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? together
13. Where were you last night? keira's
14. Something that you aren't? organized
15. Muffins? apple
16. Wish list item? sleep
17. Where did you grow up? georgia
18. Last thing you did? ate
19. What are you wearing? pajamas
20. Your TV? huge
21. Your pets? annoying
22. Friends? best
23. Your life? blessed
24. Your mood? impatient
25. Missing someone? always
26. Vehicle? accord
27. Something you’re not wearing? socks
28. Your favorite store? AE
29. Your favorite color? pink
30. When was the last time you laughed? today
31. Last time you cried? sunday
32. Your best friend? hubster
33. One place that I go to over and over? starbucks!
34. One person who emails me regularly? mom
35. Favorite place to eat? luigi's
My six - you! C'mon, you know you wanna!
Monday, October 12, 2009
Zippy what?
I found this website through a blog last year (I wish I could remember what blog, but it escapes me) & have been eyeing it ever since. I finally talked myself into shelling out the cash last weekend, the day after my trip to JoAnn's. My kit & book came early last week & I was so excited I could have jumped right out of my skin. The wonderful lady that's behind the product, Jenny, is amazing at explaining everything in her book so that even I, the craft challenged one, can totally get it. She's a real sweetheart to boot, so everyone should run over & take a peek at her site.
So keep an eye out for updates & pictures on the progression of my
quilt(s)!
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Five Sons To the Navy
I randomly stumbled upon this site while procrastinating all the housework that needs to be tended to, & thought I would share. I remember my dad telling me about these boys, & even watching an old movie about it, but this letter just brings it to a whole other realm. It broke my heart. I can't even imagine what she felt, a mother who gave all five of her sons to the Navy, only to lose all of them at once. Amazing how He seems to put things into perspective just when we need it most..
Not sure about the whole copyright thing, so I'll just post a link.
You can find her letter to President Roosevelt here.
Not sure about the whole copyright thing, so I'll just post a link.
You can find her letter to President Roosevelt here.
Here we go again..
This week has been ridiculous. A little rough at times, but mostly good ridiculous. I was super behind on homework due to being sick for almost two weeks, but I'm caught up for the most part. I still have a couple essays to work on, but who needs essays on a day like today? Not me. I kid, I kid. There's time for all that.
So besides homework craziness, there was more craziness from the Navy - we're leaving, we're not leaving, we're leaving.. No, no, just kidding, we're not leaving. Saturday? Really? Who want to get underway on a Saturday? Saturdays are for fun things, not going underway! Appearantly someone agreed with me. Dave had duty Friday & was stuck on the boat. He called at 8ish, just as we (Dad, a girlfriend of mine, the kiddos, & I) were sitting down to grub on the perfect steaks Dave had hand picked the day before that were supposed to be his last dinner but never made it to the grill that night. Like I'm going to let some of the finest NY strips this side of - well.. where are the best cows? California? They're happy, or something, right?- go to waste just because he's leaving? No sir. He says all is well & they're on schedule. Booo to that I tell him, with a big ol' mouthful of yumminess. He knows me all too well & totally called me on it. I gave him my reasoning & he agreed - no need to let them go bad. Yay! More steak for me! He gave me his list of last minute things he'd forgotten - shower shoes, his Ipod & charger, ect - which I'd already bought & gotten ready for him because I'm that awesome, & said he'd call before they got underway. After dinner was done & everyone had gone home, he called again to tell me something (we'll just leave it at something, what with OPSEC & all) had happened & they wouldn't be going afterall. First reaction - lots of happy screams & jumping around. Second reaction - guilt, accompanied by "uh oh, maybe I should have waited on the steaks?" All is well that ends well, I guess, & we totally lucked out & ended up with an extra day. It was much needed, although I spent most of it working on homework. I finally made the tuna casserole he's been requesting all in port & he was as happy as a pig in slop, even with the steak fiasco.
That brings us to today. Today is the day that the boat said time's up & that they need him more than I do. So here we go again, round number five - not that I'm counting or anything.
We spent this entire in port discussing whether Dave should re-up, especially after the bonuses disappeared in March & we weren't sure if even the new fiscal year would bring them back. The new fiscal year did indeed bring the promise of bonuses & everyone has told him if he's going to re-up, he better do it while the getting's good. We're both well aware that the economy is in shambles, so getting out isn't an option for the majority. So Dave is all set to re-up this patrol which leaves us on the boat for at least two more years, & then shore duty. Hooray shore duty! I can't even imagine what it will be like to have him home for three years. He's been gone half our marriage! I'll just be tickled pink - until he starts driving me crazy, which is enevitable when you're used to someone being gone half the year.
So besides homework craziness, there was more craziness from the Navy - we're leaving, we're not leaving, we're leaving.. No, no, just kidding, we're not leaving. Saturday? Really? Who want to get underway on a Saturday? Saturdays are for fun things, not going underway! Appearantly someone agreed with me. Dave had duty Friday & was stuck on the boat. He called at 8ish, just as we (Dad, a girlfriend of mine, the kiddos, & I) were sitting down to grub on the perfect steaks Dave had hand picked the day before that were supposed to be his last dinner but never made it to the grill that night. Like I'm going to let some of the finest NY strips this side of - well.. where are the best cows? California? They're happy, or something, right?- go to waste just because he's leaving? No sir. He says all is well & they're on schedule. Booo to that I tell him, with a big ol' mouthful of yumminess. He knows me all too well & totally called me on it. I gave him my reasoning & he agreed - no need to let them go bad. Yay! More steak for me! He gave me his list of last minute things he'd forgotten - shower shoes, his Ipod & charger, ect - which I'd already bought & gotten ready for him because I'm that awesome, & said he'd call before they got underway. After dinner was done & everyone had gone home, he called again to tell me something (we'll just leave it at something, what with OPSEC & all) had happened & they wouldn't be going afterall. First reaction - lots of happy screams & jumping around. Second reaction - guilt, accompanied by "uh oh, maybe I should have waited on the steaks?" All is well that ends well, I guess, & we totally lucked out & ended up with an extra day. It was much needed, although I spent most of it working on homework. I finally made the tuna casserole he's been requesting all in port & he was as happy as a pig in slop, even with the steak fiasco.
That brings us to today. Today is the day that the boat said time's up & that they need him more than I do. So here we go again, round number five - not that I'm counting or anything.
We spent this entire in port discussing whether Dave should re-up, especially after the bonuses disappeared in March & we weren't sure if even the new fiscal year would bring them back. The new fiscal year did indeed bring the promise of bonuses & everyone has told him if he's going to re-up, he better do it while the getting's good. We're both well aware that the economy is in shambles, so getting out isn't an option for the majority. So Dave is all set to re-up this patrol which leaves us on the boat for at least two more years, & then shore duty. Hooray shore duty! I can't even imagine what it will be like to have him home for three years. He's been gone half our marriage! I'll just be tickled pink - until he starts driving me crazy, which is enevitable when you're used to someone being gone half the year.
Bunch of sickos
It never fails to amaze me how quickly a bug can spread around this house. When I hear one of us cough it makes me shudder, the knowledge that whatever germs that person has brought home will soon be shared by at least one more of us. This latest round was shared courtesy of Chop. How that happened I'll never know seeing as he doesn't go anywhere I don't go, & we hadn't been out much the last few weeks. The fact that he has a thing for chewing on the handle of shopping carts probably doesn't help matters. Hmm.. I think I just solved the mystery.
Moving on..
This latest quarantine brought back the quilting bug that bit me right around this time last year. Who doesn't like to curl up on the couch with a comfy blanket when they're sick? That's one of the only bonuses of being sick as far as I can tell. (Especially since college professors really couldn't care less if you get behind on your homework because you're coughing & sneezing your brains out - whoda thunk it?)
Last year's quilting experiment produced little - a few random scraps that I've never been able to figure out what to do with, a new-to-me sewing machine that I bought second hand & could never even figure out how to thread - Kristy, help! - lots of pricked fingers, & finally, a glorious lovey blanket for Chop that he toted around for a week & then discarded as if his poor horribly uncrafty mother hadn't spent weeks working on it. After that, the quilting materials were stashed away in the laundry room cupboard, a reminder of my utter failure at being one of "those" moms. You know, those wonderfully crafty women who can make Halloween costumes that look way better than the store bought ones in under an hour; who can make perfect cupcakes without covering their kitchen in batter & almost catching the house on fire because of a mixer malfunction; or the one who can turn a crappy old broken mirror into a sweet work of art that adorns their laundry room. (Cough, cough.. Allie!)
Nope. No reminder needed. I'm the epitome of uncrafty.
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Moving on..
This latest quarantine brought back the quilting bug that bit me right around this time last year. Who doesn't like to curl up on the couch with a comfy blanket when they're sick? That's one of the only bonuses of being sick as far as I can tell. (Especially since college professors really couldn't care less if you get behind on your homework because you're coughing & sneezing your brains out - whoda thunk it?)
Last year's quilting experiment produced little - a few random scraps that I've never been able to figure out what to do with, a new-to-me sewing machine that I bought second hand & could never even figure out how to thread - Kristy, help! - lots of pricked fingers, & finally, a glorious lovey blanket for Chop that he toted around for a week & then discarded as if his poor horribly uncrafty mother hadn't spent weeks working on it. After that, the quilting materials were stashed away in the laundry room cupboard, a reminder of my utter failure at being one of "those" moms. You know, those wonderfully crafty women who can make Halloween costumes that look way better than the store bought ones in under an hour; who can make perfect cupcakes without covering their kitchen in batter & almost catching the house on fire because of a mixer malfunction; or the one who can turn a crappy old broken mirror into a sweet work of art that adorns their laundry room. (Cough, cough.. Allie!)
Nope. No reminder needed. I'm the epitome of uncrafty.
With that said, I refuse to be the uncrafty one anymore. If my sister can turn a few scraps of fabric into a perfectly creepy skull & crossbones apron for me, by God, I can make a quilt. A quilt that Turtle will be proud to display on her bed & maybe even take to college with her. A quilt that will not be discarded like the bottles Chop no longer has a need for. (Yes, you read that correctly - Chop randomly decided he was no longer a bottle kind of kid & would much prefer a sippy cup, thank you very much Daddy! - because for some reason he calls me Daddy rather than Mama - whatever.)
So after scouring every quilting site known to the 'net, I made the long drive to JoAnns's last night & am now the proud new owner of several yards of fabrics - pictures to follow. Nifty, nifty. You're probably wondering who would possibly want to make a quilt out of skully fabric. Well.. Me. That's who. Me & my very excited Turtle who is almost as into the whole skully thing as me. Oh, & another interesting tidbit - appearantly it's in the genes - Dad reminded me when he saw the *amazing* skully jewelry Dave surprised me with the other night, that he has a skully on the Harley. Oh yeah, that's right! My reply was, That's so freakin' cute Dad!, exactly what he wanted to hear about his big tough Iron Head, I'm sure.
So that's it. I'm making a quilt. I will succeed. I will. Because I'm the little engine that can!
(Appearantly I forgot to post this one last weekend, so it was actually 10/3, not so much 10/11)
So that's it. I'm making a quilt. I will succeed. I will. Because I'm the little engine that can!
(Appearantly I forgot to post this one last weekend, so it was actually 10/3, not so much 10/11)
Monday, September 21, 2009
Giddy as a school girl..
I've been possessed by random thoughts as of late. Random thoughts that could, but probably shouldn't, be posted on the "family" blog that only the in-laws & grandparents read. They are way more interested in pictures of the kids and other mommy stuff than my spontaneous rants on ACORN or the sweetest tattoo flip flops I've ever seen.
Besides, as we all know, because I've talking about it pretty much constantly for almost a month now, I'm in college. (Insert random "your mom goes to college" joke here.) My English comp professor is encouraging us to write out our thoughts & processes in hopes of helping us become better writers. I get it - use it or lose it, sister! Maybe I'll be able to put all my ramblings to good & hopefully up my GPA in the process. AND, maybe, just maybe, I'll actually update this one a little more than I do the family blog.
Let the brain stretching begin!
Besides, as we all know, because I've talking about it pretty much constantly for almost a month now, I'm in college. (Insert random "your mom goes to college" joke here.) My English comp professor is encouraging us to write out our thoughts & processes in hopes of helping us become better writers. I get it - use it or lose it, sister! Maybe I'll be able to put all my ramblings to good & hopefully up my GPA in the process. AND, maybe, just maybe, I'll actually update this one a little more than I do the family blog.
Let the brain stretching begin!
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